Zenon is a well-known film adaptation of a lesser-known book
Did you know that there are five Zenon books?
Growing up without cable, I missed almost every opportunity to watch Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century (1999). I didn’t care too much when I had heard of it, and it didn’t look like my cup of tea.
Then I read the book series. Few people are aware that Zenon is a film adaptation of the book of the same name. I don’t know anyone who read the books, though they seemed to sell well enough. I remember bits and pieces of each, though I’m not sure if I ever actually read the first book.
The series, written by Marilyn Sadler, was surprisingly engaging and complex for elementary-level reading. I still remember the glossary that was at the end of each book to explain all the technology and lingo from the year 2049. It was pretty fascinating stuff. It might have been the first sci-fi/futuristic book I ever read.
If you can’t tell yet, I was in love with these books. Except for the first book, I remember reading them all cover-to-cover many times. I probably still have them somewhere in my house. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to reread them before watching the film, so I’m going in mostly blind for this one.
First thing I need to address, though: the 1999 made-for-TV movie CGI. I know it was a different time and CGI was still new (even now, it’s still challenging, even in big budget films), but come on. It was excessive and distracting. The Star Trek TV shows did a much better job of finding a balance between dated CGI and reality, and I don’t even care for Star Trek all that much.
This isn’t the only time I was reminded of Star Trek. The film is set on a space station in 2049, and, for some reason, everyone wears these stylish futuristic outfits. They aren’t quite uniforms, since there was a lot of variation, but the people wear similar styles to each other.
What the movie (un?)intentionally did well was be futuristic, yet grounded in the possible reality of a 2049 world. When Zenon gets sent away to live with her aunt on Earth, you realize how the jarring cultural differences are between Earth and space.
The people on Earth dress in a mix of futuristic and modern, which makes sense given how certain trends will stay the same (jeans and flannel aren’t going anywhere). Their slang is different too, but I think, like most slang terms, they’ll go away in a year or two (Try to find two people who still say ‘shawty’ without it sounding dated. Go ahead, I’ll wait).
Zenon’s culture clash on Earth reflects the universe’s implied xenophobia problem. If the people on the space station act, talk, and dress differently, and hardly ever leave, how does that affect their relationships with people on Earth? Or maybe the kids that Zenon met are just assholes. I wonder if DCOMs have a trend of characters that are assholes for no reason.
You could get wasted off two bottles of Jack if you played a drinking game on the slang alone. Zenon (Kirsten Storms) says, “Cetus lapetus” enough times that I got sick of hearing it within the first third of the movie. Fun fact: most of the technology and slang in the movie is from the books themselves. Unfortunately, the language doesn’t work as well as it does in the book. Either it ends up feeling dated — ironic for a movie set in the future — or it’s overused in a short amount of time.
The plot is surprisingly more layered than previous DCOMs. It still relies on perfect timing and a bit of dumb luck, but otherwise it’s a fairly tight script. The space station has been floating in Earth’s orbit for 27 years, and is at risk of being shut down by a businessman if they don’t receive funding. Now, I know what you’re thinking: “Doesn’t this vaguely familiar?”
They had all the keys to make it that kind of movie: evil businessman, spunky-yet-flawed main lead, and an environment to have some fun antics in. But Zenon resolves that plot line halfway through when the owner of the station, Mr. Whyndham (Frederick Coffin) donates millions of dollars to fund research and keep the station running.
So what drives the rest of the movie? Two things: 1) Zenon’s determination to get back home after being temporarily exiled to Earth and 2) The space station actually being in danger of exploding and crashing to Earth. Because why do the clichéd ‘save the ____’ trope when you can have a race against time and nearly murder hundreds of adults and children instead?
Whyndham’s assistant, Mr. Lutz (Bob Bancroft) hacked the computers on the space station and infected the entire station with a virus that would eventually cause the station to self-destruct. Then Whyndham would collect the insurance money so he could be rich again. Not surprisingly, maintaining a space station is a costly process.
It’s a fairly efficient plan. There’s no way to track the virus, especially after the space station comes down in flames. The tragedy would focus on the band Microbe and the pop star Proto Zoa performing on the station, along with the many people on board. Whyndham will catch some flak for it, but that station’s been in space for 27 years. It would probably be seen as a freak accident rather than sabotage.
That’s not to say that the story is perfect. It relies on a few highly improbable coincidences. Mr Lutz just happened to drop the disc he used to infect the space station computers, which I guess could happen because he’s a bit bumbling and the disc is tiny. Zenon’s friend Nebula (played by the not-African-American herself, Raven-Symoné) finds it and gives the disc to Zenon as a going-away present.
Zenon also happened to be the winner of this contest that let her dance on stage with her favorite band, Microbe. She leaves Earth with them to travel the space station and manages to install the disc modified by her friend to reverse the virus, just seconds before the whole place goes up in flames. They cut it real close.
Despite coincidences like this, everything is well-connected and there aren’t too many loose ends left. I’m curious how much more worldbuilding they’ll do in the sequels, and if they’ll expand on the potential results of living in this kind of world.
Do they still have racism? How can the people in the space station not ever be sick? Couldn’t a plague wipe them out? Is the space station an elitist operation? Does mass incarceration exist?
Unlike the previous film, Halloweentown, this one has more developed leads. Zenon as a character is probably one of the better DCOM characters, partially because she was based off a decently-written character. However, I think Book Zenon is a bit more likable than Film Zenon. My reasoning? Reading catchphrases in a book is much less irritating than hearing a whiny, high-pitched-voiced teen girl saying them every two minutes.
I think that was why I couldn’t fully connect with her. She’s got lots of charm and wit, but is essentially an overly-curious teenage girl. She probably should have been kicked off the station years ago. Sure, the same thing should have happened to Book Zenon, but there was more honesty and sincerity behind her. Regardless, I can still appreciate a good comeback.
Margie: My friends have a bet. With those clothes, and that do, you must be from some viral extreme place like East Jersey. My guess is that you’re getting a 6-month head start on Halloween.
Zenon: You’re right, it’s the Halloween thing. Now lend me that mask your wearing, and I’ll have the most hideous major costume ever!
I do like Film Zenon, but her relationships with others is what makes her more tolerable. Her best friend, Nebula, is similar to Zenon in interests (and both can make excited screams like they’re the Wonder Twins version of Black Canary). But she’s more down-to-earth (heh) than Zenon. The two of them keep each other balanced, with Zenon getting into various antics while Nebula tries her best to keep Zenon’s head out of the stratosphere.
The other main character/love interest is Greg (Gregory Smith, i.e. the kid from Small Soldiers) who lives in Zenon’s town on Earth. Hopefully, this isn’t the school he had the bomb threat for. Greg is the one with the most heart in the entire movie, probably because he’s the character who’s the least dickish. My only concern with him is that his kindness is all that’s to him. I don’t remember anything more notable from him.
His friends, on the other hand were at least interesting archetypes. We have the smart, techy black kid who somehow hacks a multimillion dollar corporation through his tablet with relative ease (Side note: they better not pair him up with Nebula in the next movie, I swear to god). Then you have the, for lack of a better word, extremely bitchy antagonist, Margie, who is into Greg. However, Greg reveals later that he was only using her for the stuff she had. Hmm, maybe Greg is an asshole too. Maybe I didn’t like the characters then…
Anyway, let’s talk about some of the adults. Commander Plank, despite being a total hard-ass, does have a soft spot for Zenon. He gets his own love interest with Zenon’s aunt, who accidentally gets transported to space with Zenon and Microbe.
While I don’t care for any of them of them too much, I loved Commander Plank’s conversation with Zenon’s parents as the space station was shutting down. Their delivery and acting was so serious that it looked like a deleted scene from Star Trek. Sometimes you forget that there are real actors in these movies. Disney knows what they’re doing and at least cares about its image. Hey, if you want real actors to give bad performances, watch Lifetime.
All in all, Zenon is a surprisingly complex movie, with some gems that lift it up from being an otherwise average sci-fi TV movie. It makes me want to pick up my old books again. If I can find the books, I’ll take some photos, transcribe the lingo, and integrate it into the post.
What’s the next film? Can of Worms? I can’t even tell you what it’s about. The poster for it just makes me more confused.
This is part of an ongoing series on the entire Disney Channel Original Movie canon. You can follow me on Twitter and Instagram to r̶e̶a̶d̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶r̶a̶m̶b̶l̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ stay updated on my posts.
